View Full Version : The fox recorder: Part 2

October 31st, 2007, 11:03 AM
The Abbey seems to have fallen into an eerie silence. A new abbot has been appointed, a mouse by the name of Leaf, but the entire Abbey seems to be depressed. I need advice in this time of dire need, so I have gone to ask Martin what to do. These foxes had been my kin once, so it is my fault they attacked our abbey. I need to ask a warriors advice, to find what I must do next.
I have been told that in past seasons, Martin was a warrior. Now, he is very old, and his whiskers have turned gray. It was he who founded the abbey, many seasons ago. He is the only one who is alive from that time, and soon he will die. It was this mouse who took me in, when I was cold, hungry and lost in the woods. My friend Petra, the hedgehog, and I went to see him.
“Come to me young one,” he said as I entered the chamber. “Ah, it’s young Chuvacki the fox,” I nodded.
“And me!” interrupted Petra, making herself known. Martin nodded to her, and then turned his gaze back to me.
“What brings you here?’ I felt the heat rise in my cheeks. I took a deep breath, and blurted it out.
“Sir, it’s the foxes. It’s my fault they’re here. I think that they’ve come for me,” Martin and Petra waited for an explanation.
“Deep in Mossflower woods, there is the camp of a fox horde. This is where I was born, about three seasons ago,” Petra gave a look of surprise.
“But that would make you a dibbun!”
“I was never a dibbun. I never had any carefree days of fun. But once, I was a babe. When I was first born, a dagger was thrust into my paws. I gripped the dagger as if I had been born to hold it. While waving it around, I killed my own mother. I learned to walk in a week. All day, for a week, they forced me to try to walk, until I learned. The next week, I was brought to school. I learned to read, write and speak. But that school was only for half the day. The next half of the day was battles. We were forced to fight each other.
We were not aloud to stop to rest or eat until they told us to stop. Then, we ate the dead carcasses. We slept wherever we fell. Soon we were given one on one battles. It was a tournament. The winner would face the next best, the winner of another battle. We were not given clothes, or names. We knew nothing about friendship or love. We all hoped thay someday we’d be taken into the army. Those beasts excepted into the army were the beasts that survived school.
I was the best of the best. I killed my mother when I was born. They all feared me. I killed anyone who tried to fight me. My fur was stained with blood, and so was my small dagger. I was fiercer and wilder than any of them.
But when my second season birthday came, everything changed. I was huddling near a fire, on a cold night. The chief’s son, Bloodbath, said something that bothered me. It was some petty insult, but in my savagery, I killed him. I ran. If the chief knew I had killed his son, it would be the death of me. I ran from the camp, still clutching my dagger. I was naked, and it was cold.
Then, it began to snow. White flakes seemed to glow on my red fur, and where I walked, the snow was red. I ran for hours. It was exhausting, but I knew I couldn’t stop. If I did, I knew I would be frozen to death.
I found myself tripping and falling down some sort of hole. The hole smelled of death. I tripped over something cold and lifeless. It was an adder, but it was in a deep sleep. I killed it quickly, and slipped into its skin for warmth. It smelled terrible, but I needed to stay warm. I slept then. When I woke, I found that the hole had a dusting of snow covering the floor. I crawled from the snake carcass, and cut some skin to use as a cloak. The skin was cold and dead, but it would shield me from the wind.
I climbed out of the hole. The entire world was still and quiet. But all around, I saw pawmarks that the horde left. I ran again. I ran all day until I fell asleep. When I woke, I ran again. I don’t know how long this went on, but one day, when I fell asleep, I woke up here,” Petra and Martin stared at me.
“That’s why they’re after me,” I explained. “You have been so kind to me, but now, I must go seek out these foxes,”
“You’re not going alone!” Petra insisted. “I have to go with you!” I was about to protest, when Martin said:
“Chuvacki must go alone,”
“I will deliver myself to the foxes. My life in return for yours. They will leave you alone. They only want revenge,” The old mouse peered into my eyes.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” I nodded vigorously.
“Then it is decided. You will leave at sunset,” So this shall be my last entry as recorder of Redwall. I wish the next recorder well, and hope that I shall be remembered here.

- Chuvacki, Recorder of Redwall Abbey

Part three will come soon enough....In about a week....Maybe more...Or something.

Gorath the Flame
November 1st, 2007, 06:19 AM
Interesting.... the only thing that bothers me is you made them look quite savage, but they still had school.

November 1st, 2007, 08:33 AM
Interesting.... the only thing that bothers me is you made them look quite savage, but they still had school.

Yes, well, even savages are intellegent. I needed a literate savage to suit my puposes.

Mad Maudie McBurl
February 29th, 2008, 04:34 PM
I'm speachless. this is better than my storys.
(they are not posted on here.)

February 29th, 2008, 04:38 PM
I'm speachless. this is better than my storys.
(they are not posted on here.)

Thank you. But really, this isn't that great. I've written better, (and read better).

You did that capslock thing again. :D :rolleyes:

I'd like to read some of your writing.