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Comments for "Ojoll"
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Thread: Comments for "Ojoll"

  1. #1
    Patroller Lord Thunderpaw's Avatar
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    Comments for "Ojoll"

    Comments for my continuing fan fic, "Ojoll".

  2. #2
    Patroller Lady Constance's Avatar
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    It's great! You've really got some potential! The one thing I noticed was that there wasn't any indentions or real paragraphs. But that's okay. I didn't even know indentions existed until I went to a writing class. And I only use them when I'm writing.

    I can't say how I overall enjoyed it, 'cause I haven't read enough. As far as it's been going I like it. Especially the part with the Dibbuns promising to not go down and rob the kitchen!!
    "I'm a beast, I am, and a badger once more. We don't change, we hold on!"

    Trufflehunter/Prince Caspian/Narnia

  3. #3
    Patroller Lord Thunderpaw's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady Constance View Post
    It's great! You've really got some potential! The one thing I noticed was that there wasn't any indentions or real paragraphs. But that's okay. I didn't even know indentions existed until I went to a writing class.
    I indented and made paragraphs on Microsoft Word but when I copied and pasted it here it went away, I guess.


    Click here or on either of the cropped images above to see more like them (link goes to my deviantART gallery

    My Fan-Made Redwall Dictionary

  4. #4
    Patroller Lady Constance's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Thunderpaw View Post
    I indented and made paragraphs on Microsoft Word but when I copied and pasted it here it went away, I guess.
    I was wondering if it did that. Oh well, it's still good without the indentions. The one other thing I forgot to mention before was the chapters should be just a bit longer.

    When will the next installment be?
    "I'm a beast, I am, and a badger once more. We don't change, we hold on!"

    Trufflehunter/Prince Caspian/Narnia

  5. #5
    Patroller Lord Thunderpaw's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady Constance View Post
    When will the next installment be?
    I changed a lot of stuff so I don't know. You were the only person here who took interest in "Ojoll" so that's a reason I started a new-ish story.


    Click here or on either of the cropped images above to see more like them (link goes to my deviantART gallery

    My Fan-Made Redwall Dictionary

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